Happy Birthday to me! I enjoy using my birthday as a moment to reflect on my life and be proud of how far I’ve come. It gives me a chance to embrace the beauty of growing wiser and older (it doesn’t always have to be sad!), and to be truly grateful of the life I’m living.
Inspired by Heart Envangelista, I decided to compose a list of 20 things I have learnt in my young years. I’ll admit, it was hard not to exceed 20 things, but I think I’ve nailed it (it’s my birthday so I’m allowed to gloat a little bit xx). Keep reading to see the life lessons I’ve personally learnt so far!
1. Your path may change, but your destiny will never.
So be fixed and focused on your goals, but do not stress too much over how you will get there.
2. It is okay to let your guard down sometimes!
The world (well, most of the world) is not out to get you! Being overly defensive all the time really is exhausting, so just let loose and liven up!
3. Do not take things personally. People’s words and actions to you are filtered by whatever personal things they are going through.
If someone is unpleasant to you, they may just be going through a really difficult period in their life. Wish them well, brush it off and whatever you do, do not fixate over it (over thinkers I’m speaking to you especially x).
4. Do not change yourself for a boy. Ever!
This one speaks for itself really.
5. Life is more fun and enjoyable when you don’t take yourself too seriously!
6. You will attract the people fated to be in your life just by being yourself.
Don’t dilute your personality and be someone you’re not in order to make friends. By being your natural self, the right people will gravitate to you, and it turns out these are the best kind of people you can possibly to surround yourself with.
7. Being alone doesn’t necessarily mean being lonely.
8. Ingredients to fix heartbreak: a mirror.
Trust me on this one. It works like a charm!
9. You will start your journey of finding true happiness the moment you finally stop following the crowd and copying other people.
10. It is important to frequently listen to the songs you loved when you were a pre-teen.
12 year old me had great taste! You may find a couple in the xdesfan playlist – will be uploaded to the site soon! 😉
11. But it’s even more important to eat three meals a day and sleep well!
These things really do matter and it has a very strong influence on your quality of life. It’s so easy not to put this as a top priority, but let me tell you – once you do this, all your other priorities become easier to handle! I promise x.
12. The years of a friendship do not determine the quality of it!
You could know someone your entire life and still not count them as one of your closest – but this is okay!
13. Tea is 100% better than coffee!
After numerous occasions where I’d be literally shaking after drinking coffee in late night study sessions, I have finally learnt my lesson.
14. You can’t force people to be in your life, and if you do, they will not benefit you in anyway, nor will you benefit them.
I’ve only just learnt this one recently – clearly still growing! The truth is people come and people go, even when you don’t want them to. If they’re not meant to stay, then they are simply not meant to stay. Of course this isn’t the case for everyone – and you certainly shouldn’t treat people like they are disposable – but once someone has served their purpose in your life and it is time for them to go, no good will come out of clinging on to them.
15. Your concept of living your best life does not need to be the same as someone else’s.
Mainstream and social media seem to have perpetuated a fixed image of what the greatest life and the best time looks like. You could be happy and comfortable with the way you’re living, then take one glance at someone’s Instagram story to see them training hard for an ultra marathon (Idk how they do it!). Or go onto Snapchat and see someone screaming whilst they’re all muddy in a wild festival mosh pit. Just because their version of living their best lives isn’t the same as yours doesn’t mean that yours is wrong.
16. You’ll be happier once you resist yourself from setting unrealistic expectations of other people.
I find this to be the easiest way to stop getting disappointed and frustrated with people. Honestly, they’re human just like you! It really is unfair for you to require so much from them, when they’re just out here trying to survive. I am NOT saying give up on people and expect little of them, but I am saying once you stop setting sky high standards, it can become easier to discover peace in the relationships you hold with others.
17. If you don’t let yourself rest your body will force you to!
Unfortunately, I’ve had to learn this the hard way several times before it finally kept with me.
18. It is inevitable that people will have certain fixed perceptions of you. But it is NOT your responsibility to change them, nor is it your duty to alter yourself in order to stay true to those perceptions they have of you.
You’re not obligated to become what the person others desire you to be – and vice versa.
19. People may try to project their own insecurities and inabilities on to you, or attempt to drag you down with it, but you are not them nor will you ever be.
Do not let someone else’s insecurities jeopardise your journey in life.
And finally, the most important thing I’ve come to acknowledge in my 20 years …
20. Life really is too short to let fear and doubt hold you back from doing the things you love, being who you want to be, and living a life you’re proud of.
So, take risks and be true a go getter!
★
– XDESFAN
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